^{Just X-Files}

First of all, this has spoilers. Mostly about the X-Files season finale. Secondly, this is about nothing but the X-Files. None of the pithy commentary and intellectual meandering you've come to expect from the Boneyard. Just the X-Files. Well, a little about the Simpsons too, but mostly the X-Files.

The only problem I had with the X-Files season finale was Krychek's death. Krychek was the only character who, for me, never had a stale moment. Here's a guy who's been shot, stabbed, blown up, tossed in a Russian prison, dangled off a balcony by handcuffs, possessed by an alien back when that meant something, buried alive, had his arm cut off and had to vomit a living alien out his eyeballs. Like a cockroach, this guy was the ultimate survivor. Getting shot in the head in a parking garage is just too damn two-bit for me.

The X-Files has always been willing to go the extra yard for a cheap thrill. But the cheap thrills are no longer thrilling. When Deep Throat was shot back at the end of the first season,it was stunning. First of all, the morons at Fox didn't advertise the thing by saying "SOMEONE WILL DIE IN THIS EPISODE!!!!!" And it hadn't happened before. Since then, we've seen all kinds of sudden, brutal deaths. It felt like they needed to mark the show as a finale and the audience likes Krychek more than Agent What's-her-name-who-helps-Scully-give-birth. Hence, more shock value.

I thought they should have hung it up last season. Duchovny clearly wanted out, although, after seeing the previews for Evolution, we can justifiably ask why. The thrills to boring explication ratio had plummetted. And they had done everything before. They wrote a top-notch finale last season with Mulder's abduction and Scully's mystery pregnancy. (It was written before the writers knew the show would be back.) It was a good time to call it a day.

That said, I think the X-Files has put together a fairly decent season. By killing off the whole conspiracy, the aliens got to be mysterious again. I like Agent Doggett, who will forever be called "that Terminator 2 guy" even though Terminator 2 was a really crappy movie. Seriously, I dare you to watch it now. Although Doggett's general demeanor combined with Scully's mystery pregnancy for a pretty grim tone, they put together some decent episodes. The Monster of the Week episode about the "sin-eater" who devours people along with their ailments was one of the best MOTW's ever. Doggett's successful switchblade spinal slug-ectomy on Scully in the back of a bus while surrounded by zombies was a classic X-Files moment: gross, over the top, funny, scary and decently different. They did okay.

I was happy with the finale. The birth scene was especially creepy. The chases were good, the characters decently written and the Lone Gunmen got to be the three wisemen. (Although, Julie pointed out to me that there's something really strange about Scully naming her kid William after someone named Billy Miles just tried to kill them both.) There's still some mystery about the kid, but I'm happy with Mulder as the father and the kiss was well-done. Well-done, that is, if it's the end of the series. It's really just a problem of being on for ten frigging seasons. There are only so many different ways monsters can stalk/kill/eat/dump people. We've seen it before. There are only so many secondary characters who can be justly/unjustly killed.

The X-Files was the best science fiction show ever. But no matter how well they write it, act it and film it, it's just old. The heyday was clearly around seasons 2-5. The show can certainly deliver moments, but an entire episode no longer stuns the way it used to.

The Simpsons fell into the same spot a few seasons back. I remember when an episode of the Simpsons felt like it was five minutes long and all funny. Now, regular episodes are indistinguishable from Halloween episodes and the funny parts barely outnumber the embarrassing parts, the parts that seem like an insult to a once great show. Who doesn't cringe when you hear something like "Guest voices, Mel Gibson and Jerry Hall!" The Simpsons, like the X-Files, still delivers some great moments, but it's no longer a great show.

The problem is they're both on Fox, which is only a couple of shows away from being UPN. Fox won't let anything happen with dignity, so why should it let it's shows die with dignity?